The Daily Debrief

About two weeks ago I needed a combination therapy/cup of coffee/put-on-your-big-girl-panties conversation, so I called up a friend who's been in Fiji for a long time and has ridden out the waves with grace and poise. Sweetheart that she is, she met me that very afternoon for a long talk.

While all of our conversation was helpful, the biggest gift that she gave me was some structure to my journaling. I'm a big believer in writing and try to do it regularly, but although I've used prompts I don't tend to stick with them. Enter (fanfare please) The Daily Debrief.

Written first thing in the morning each day, the debrief has three main parts - good things, bad things, and intentions.

• Good things (5) has overall mood and is ranked by benefit and enjoyment. Strive for five -- even after a rough day there are five good things to look back on.
• Bad Things (3 or less) can be skipped after good days. A key point here is to LIMIT the number of bad things written about and also to acknowledge mistakes
• Intentions (1-3) are the priorities for the day, the attitude adjustment to facing the world, the change to behaviors so mistakes don't happen again. This section is also limited to just 3 intentions for the day. This avoids analysis paralysis as well as that sense of guilt if the to-do list doesn't go to-done at the end of the day. 

I've been doing this fairly regularly for the last two weeks and it's been wonderful for me. There's something about seeing my worries in writing that makes them more manageable. I've been surprised by how few worries we actually have -- even though the ones we have are big ones -- and even after the roughest days how much there is to be thankful for in our lives. Simply getting it all out has definitely helped calm my mind. The very act of thinking about what I want to do next has helped me focus my time and be more productive.

Keep the boredom at bay

Summers growing up were long and hot. We didn't have a TV and the city pool didn't open until 3PM, so I learned at an early age that I needed to be good at entertaining myself. This has served me well over the years as I've had anywhere from a few hours of downtime to entire months. Here's a short list of things I've fallen back at different times on to keep my mind and body active:

- visit museums, libraries, galleries. Prep for the visit by reading up about what you're going to see. After the visit research questions you had and things of interest that you learned about on the outing
- take a local tour - none scheduled? Ask around, often there are people with specialties in the most surprising things that would be happy to show you what they know
- join organizations, like a library book club
- start an organization, like a geocache club
- check facebook events for things happening near you
- reconnect with old friends either in person or via phone
- ask a new friend out for coffee
- walk or bike around your current location
- plan meals with new recipes or special ingredients, make an outing out of finding ingredients, photograph each step of the meal prep
- go for body work - massage, facial, pedicure, etc.

Good luck!

Can't work, but this isn't exactly working

For most of us we have no choice - we must bring home a paycheck or the bills don't get paid. But there are some of us who have to cool our heels, some less voluntarily than others. When I moved to Fiji I became one of them. My visa is a resident visa - pretty much the only thing I am allowed to do is reside in this country. 

There is something that I am allowed to do, and luckily it comes to me as easily as breathing - I can connect people.  

I've written previously about the different international organizations here in Suva for new arrivals like myself. One of them is Suva University Partners and Spouses International - SUPASI. Today I sat down for the chat portion of "Shut Up and Write!" and one of the SUPASI members asked who he should contact to start a local chapter of Operação Nariz Vermelho (Operation Red Nose) here in Fiji. Completely and totally by chance the former organizer of the Corona Fiji trolley volunteers had just sat down next to us. I introduced the two of them and they exchanged contact info. 

Wow! 

I'm super excited! These are both such super organizations and seeing reps from each one trade info and ideas is so cool. 

Corona Fiji raises money for the Colonial War Memorial Hospital here in Suva through raffles, cash donations, and in kind donations from its members. The members then take the in-kind donations of toys, toiletries, new and gently used baby, children, and women's clothing by its members and stock a rolling cart. Each Friday morning 5 volunteers roll the trolley stocked with these donated items around the maternity, antenatal and paediatric wards. The items are priced at pennies on the dollar of their actual worth, many only $1FJD or so. All the proceeds are donated back to CWM in the form of much needed medical equipment or non-medical items. 

Operation Red Nose goal is to bring joy to hospitalized children, their families, and the health professionals that care for them through visits from "Doctor Clown." This was started in 2002 in Portugal after its founder Beatrize Quintella read an article about Clown Doctors visiting American children. The Clown Doctors of Operation Red Nose have a heart on their nose - a red nose of infinite generosity. 

I can't work for pay, I'm even super limited in how I volunteer my time, but I am super excited about how the people I bring together spark ideas. Together we're making things happen and I love it. 

If you really want to know someone, take away their wifi

My home internet has been spotty since Cyclone Winston in late February. (I also have mold everywhere, but that's a whole different story)

I've heard it said that if you really want to know someone you should travel with them. To that, I would add, spend some time with them when you have spotty/slow internet.

In case you're wondering, I get cranky without my internet.

This concludes our special post, which is a replacement for the post that didn't upload and then disappeared.

The Most Dangerous Writing App

Matt Young posted a link to The Most Dangerous Writing App in our Shut Up and Write! Suva facebook group. Not sure why I didn't click on it before, but I did tonight and figured I can do anything for five minutes.  Following is what five minutes inside my brain looks like: 

What do I do how do I type how does this work? One two three four five
dunno what if someone talks to me oh this is interesting and holy crap five minutes is a super long time oh shit how do I keep my fingers moving for this long? No countdown timer. 
Um
got nothing
although I do think I want to try making this into a blog post. It's certainly interesting. 
I wish I had hit 100 words this fast using other methods!!! 
One thing about this is it's just a brain dump, it's not actually real content
and why the hell did I set it for five solid minutes and not like one minute
I can feel my hands cramp up. 
EEEEEEEEEEEEE
I really need a five second counter to know how long I've been staring at my screen..
what if my control C doesn't work and I lose everything? 
and seriously - 155 words? how is this even possible? I had to knock out 2000 words and it took me a week
of course, that article actually made some sense
I don't know how much sense this makes, but I've been doing it for three minutes now....
five seconds or I lose everything. I need a longer lag. 
ok, the screen went white
and I guess I now know what hardcore mode is --- you truly DO lose everything if you stop. 
I'm down to one minute now
I can do this. 
hmmmm
basic writing - beginning, middle, end
I started this just to see what it was like
and now the tap is opened and I'm going to run out of time. 
Wow. 
the cure to writer's block truly IS to start writing. What an experience this has been! 
Not that this entry is worth anything, but hey, my heart rate is up, my brain is moving things around. Nice. 

1610c 315w 63wpm

Not sure if I want to do it again.... but ...... it's certainly been an experience!

Heartbreak, Fiji Style

Looks like I fell well and truly in love with Fiji in 2013. And on this day three years later Fiji has tried to break my heart. Winston, maternal and child health and mortality, the frequent comings and goings that are part and parcel of expat life. I don't know that my heart can take too many more days like this. Although today I did witness that even when horrible things happen we don't have to go through it alone.

I love Fiji. I miss the US. And yet today showed me that my roots are digging in deeper each and every day.

In the end it's a good thing to have roots, right? Even if they pull at your heart sometimes?

Fair, Medium, Deep, Brown, Black?

I'm 50 shades of I'm not sure what to call my skin color. My arms are the darkest because I'm almost always sleeveless here, my bum is the lightest because it's always covered. In between I'm at least 50 different shades. I'm a little worried about the quantity of sun exposure I've gotten this last year, but not exactly sure what I can do about it other than cover up and stay in the shade. I try to swim three times a week, and I'm really good about using sunblock on my face and wearing a rash guard for sun protection. As hot as it's been lately I'm starting to wonder what the evening hours are at the pool! 

It's really interesting to me to hear my skin tone discussed. Growing up in the US I've always thought of myself as having dark skin, but here I'm regularly told that I'm very fair. At coffee one day one woman said that I was white. I think she was referring more to my cultural and mental perspectives rather than the tone of my skin, but it's still so surprising to hear myself discussed and referred to in this way. 

So, if beauty is in the eye of the beholder, does skin color fall into the same category?